Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Life

So I am awake here just after midnight in my humble Provo student apartment pondering the direction my life is taking lately. Or lack thereof would probably make a better description. I just realized that my priority registration date for fall semester was tonight at midnight, so I am frantically trying to decide which classes to take and what I want my schedule to be. But of course the BYU network is so backed up with crazy students all signing up at the same time that I am free to blog up my dilemma. Here I am about to finish my fourth semester at BYU and I STILL don't feel any closer to accomplishing anything. I have yet to apply to and hopefully get into the nursing program, or decide if that is even still in the cards for me. My chances are looking slim now that my college GPA is slowly declining and I just feel more and more burnt out as the days go by. Should I apply to other nursing programs? UVU? BYU-I? Get my bachelors at BYU in exercise science or something and then continue on in a two-year program elsewhere?
Growing up I always knew what I wanted. I got through school with the mentality "Do my best, and be the best." High school was a challenge I was more than ready to undertake. I knew I wanted a high ranking and to be placed in the satisfactory top 1%, but back then the way in which I went about it didn't really matter. Not many choices, and whatever classes I took would get me to my eventual goal as long as I did well. Now I have too many choices to comprehend, and I don't even know where to begin! Plus the ever-impounding pressures of finances, finally obtaining a car, a couple steady jobs, and maybe EVENTUALLY finding my prince charming so we can start that wonderful family life I've always dreamed of. But my life's journey is no where near over yet, and right now I'm not even sure where this part of it fits. I'm sure everything will turn out in the end as the Lord intended it, but until then, I just wish life would slow down for a minute so I could maybe catch my breath!

1 comment:

Lisa said...

You have been doing a lot of thinking lately. Any decisions? You are an incredible and fabulous girl. I wish you could see yourself like others see you. So talented and beautiful. Everything you want in life will come to you- maybe when you least expect it.